This week was another for the books in terms of stress and emotional throttling. Tuesday was the dreaded night of my Sleep Study. For those not familiar, this is where you stay overnight at a specialized clinic where you get hooked up by all these wires and straps designed to document your sleeping habits. I believe it’s mainly to discover if an individual has Sleep Apnea, but believe they can detect all manners of sleep disruption from grinding teeth to restless leg syndrome to not staying in varying levels of deep sleep long enough to gain any real benefit.
I got all hooked up — minus one piece of equipment — and felt decently relaxed. I had company and all the gadgets weren’t extremely intrusive, but I made sure we were finished and that nothing would be placed around my nose or mouth. Unfortunately, that was what that final missing piece of equipment was, and my technologist told me they place it on last because it’s the piece most people hate. They place it on just before beginning the study, and I was concerned. Having things on my face in this area usually causes me to panic.
And panic I did, barely five minutes into the study. Being able to talk on the phone calmed me down for some time (and supposedly I fell asleep, which I don’t recall), but it wasn’t allowed for long and halfway into the Sleep Study (three hours) I threw in the towel. Considering I wasn’t able to sleep, I felt it was pointless as I’d have to return again and my panic was getting really bad feeling trapped there. It was pretty embarrassing and I’m still beating myself up over it. Also, because I wasn’t able to make the entire six hours insurance may not cover it. This is a financial blow I’m not exactly able to endure and I hope some compromise can be met.
Bah! There is more, but on to the good! Things I am Thankful for...
- My friend Kate being sweet enough to not only drive me to the Sleep Study (since the demise of my car) and keep me company until it began, but also being patient and picking me up at about 3am when my panic hit a high and I called it quits.
- Also, I am thankful she has joined my grandmother and I on Mondays to watch Under the Dome!
- I’m very Thankful for the sweet card I received in the mail from my technologist during the Sleep Study. She said she was sorry I was unable to sleep much and hoped to see me back so they can better determine my sleep issues. She was incredibly sweet throughout the entire process and it was a very touching note.
- Initiating Radio Silence. During the past week and a half I’ve cut down on my online chatter for the most part via FB/Twitter/Gchat. I also made an executive decision to take a momentary break from reading many of the blogs I’ve been catching up on. It may seem negative, but in reality I begin to get so far behind and become stressed where most of my time is spent catching up, and I barely feel able to complete any of my own specific blog pieces. So I took some time and worked on some of my own personal blog tasks. It helps counteract the assaulting thoughts of giving up on blogging/writing.
- Logitech c920. Finally, after months I was able to buy the webcam I’ve been obsessing about. Not that I will participate in the weekend video brunches >.> but it’s a step in the right direction, no?
- Trailer Tuesday’s Blog Badge.
- Taking the time to focus on writing my first movie review. It was of 2 Guns and I am currently working on Elysium. It was met with positive critique from some long time friends (and some new), and while I feel it was a bit clunky, I think they will get better as I find my voice in the medium.
- Make-up sex. ‘Nuff said.
- Seeing Kick-Ass 2. One movie I had been really hyped to see and I’m looking forward to attempting a review of it. I think it will be one of the more difficult for me.
- Just in case I never mentioned it… I’m Thankful for being honored with Lizzi’s Golden Sideboob Award! I will have it up soon… I’m slow…
Feel free to leave your Thankful List in the comments below, if you aren’t participating directly with the blog hop!